I guess thats where this starts.

I'd be lying if I said the last few months have been easy. I mean they were easily the most uncertain, unstable, anxiety creating months yet. If you told me at the start of Christmas Holidays that in less then a month I would be saying goodbye to my work fam to start a new adventure with a new company - I would have told you that your crazy. (Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my new job & I am so THANKFUL for this amazing opportunity!) Its wild how quickly things can change!

Usually change scares me. I am very much a person who settles into routine easily. I like knowing what I can expect day to day. Not this time though. The scared I felt with this new adventure was a GOOD scared - if that makes any sense at all. I couldn't wait to meet my new team, or decorate my new office. To be doing something other then sitting in the anxious waters of the last few months felt so good. So good that I couldn't even really be scared - just excited.

It's no secret now, but the company I worked for was preparing to sell. We weren't sure when but constant news through the grape vine gave us some idea. No real answers caused so much anxiety. Each day I found myself waiting for the other shoe to drop. I loved the people I worked with. The idea of leaving these people internally hurt my heart. It just wasn't great for my mental anymore and I had to make a change.

I am 2 weeks into my new adventure now. The change in atmosphere has been incredible. The environment to learn, to be able to ask questions, to find confidence in myself again - these parts of my career had been lacking for so long. Each day I feel like I am walking into a world of color after having my eyes closed and only seeing the dark for so long.

I look back at a year ago, and I am not the same person I was when I walked into those doors for the first time. That girl was soft. Was easily pushed around. Worried about every mistake, wanted everyone to like her. I have grown so much since then. I don't know who that girl is anymore.

I guess thats where this starts. My new beginning. The one where mistakes are okay, and I am unbothered if someone doesn't like me. Where confidence learns to grow - and where I realize that soft isn't bad as long as you have a backbone.